Two items on the agenda today! Well, three if you count the salad.
In fact, I can cover the salad ground briefly right now: it’s fresh, it’s seasonal, it’s healthy, it’s vegan, it’s crunchy and avocado-creamy, and it’s delicious. It’s also completely self-explanatory, which allows me to talk about something else with you today. Selfish, I know, but sometimes these things can speak for themselves… Everyone knows that celery is especially eloquent.
Anyway, I was readingthis lovely post by my friend Sara the other day, and it reminded me of something I thought of a while back and keep meaning to discuss.
A wise (maybe? sometimes?) cartoon man once said it: You don’t win friends with salad.
I sigh. Is it true? I love Homer. I also love salad. I love this salad. How is this post going to affect our friendship? I care about what you think. I think about what you think. Not enough to make it creepy or sad, but, ya know–I like you, and I like that you’re here. I’m not too cool to tell you.
I can’t be the only not-at-all-an-actor (unless you count acting like a weirdo) who secretly wishes to be interviewed by James Lipton. First of all, he is awesome. Second of all, he has some amazing questions… Like the ones he always asks about favorite/least favorite words. I like talking about words.
And boy oh boy. I think I could go on a rather long rant about “awkward.” I can’t think of any other word that has been abused and misused like poor little “awkward.” I don’t dislike the word itself–not everyone can pull off the w-k-w combo! That is impressive. However. It seems everything today is “awkward.” It’s like we’re all stuck in that Alanis Morissette song about irony. A black fly in your chardonnay isn’t ironic, Alanis, and neither is it awkward, Lots of Other People. It’s gross.
That felt so good, you guys. Thank you for letting me put on my grouchy pants.
Let’s talk about words we like now. I have many! Among them: juicy, roasted, spicy, sweet, tart, creamy, orange, green. Do you see where I’m going? I’m going to salad town.
So! I turned another year older on Monday. No big deal. I randomly acquired a tiara on Friday at another party (it was fate). Tacos and margaritas with my family happened on Saturday, as did a nap. I went out with my friends, who, dare I say, are the funnest EVER. The highlight of my actual birthday was hands-down taking the day off and begrudgingly changing out of sweats only to go get a sandwich and milkshake for lunch. I suspect the only thing that will be different 60 (knock on wood (or maybe not, whatever)) years from now is that I won’t bother putting on real clothes.
I think this year is off to a good start. So good, that I think I need to make a list. I’ve seen “x number of things to do before x age” lists on other blogs, and I think it’s my turn… Except I’m doing this exclusively about food. I’ve concocted a few concoctions, but there are many, many more I haven’t tried. In my 27th year of livin’ life, I’m going to make 27 things I’ve never attempted before.
There are many things wrong with me… That much is true. I’m terrible at exactly 100% of sports, 88% of conversation-making and 93% of general life skills. But the guacamole-making part of my brain works like a fine-tuned DELICIOUS machine.